A student once said to me: "Roshi, in Zen there is compassion, but in chess there is no compassion. It's a ruthless game with a winner and loser. Why do you always talk about chess?" I understand what the student is saying, but he is wrong. If you beat me, I am grateful because I almost certainly learned something about chess and so have become a better player. In Zen we say that the giver of a gift should be grateful because true giving is the manifestation of Avalokitesvara Bodhisattva. In true giving, there is no expectation of thanks or a return of favor. One gives like a lake giving water vapor to the sky. It's completely natural and unforced. There's no expectation of of a certain cloud formation. In chess, the loser should be grateful because the loser usually learned more about chess than the person who won. If in losing, you are grateful, you are a true loser! 100% Buddha.

Also, when I lose I have to let go of any idea of a self who "lost." There is no winning or losing in the Dharma. Still, it is necessary to talk of winning and losing when we play chess. We should not be afraid of words. I say "I" and "you" but I know there's no separation.

If I beat you, I am happy, but also a little sad if you are sad. So there should be compassion in winning as well. Winning or losing is the same event seen from two different vantage points. Really, there is just the chess game. Winner and loser are not two. That's compassion.